lunacy to hero

a man spoke tonite that i have heard before. he is from new york. the last time i heard him speak i was in northern ireland 5 years ago. he has my heart, and thats very rare. he doesnt speak or think like a normal "Christian", but is very real, very in your face and very offensive to those not wanting to see or open their eyes to the real world, or talks about things that arent very uplifting. he is not conventional in his ideas or actions, he just moves. acts. instinctively, bcuz God has placed a calling all around him. the need is his call. as it should be all of ours.

i was crying the whole service and had to leave just as he finished and was walking thru the streets of dublin, tears streaming down my face, so broken, so refreshed at someone speaking and walking and living in the same calling i see on myself. ppl dont understand this dude, what he does, why he does it, why he places himself in the most dangerous situations, they just dont understand. there are very few that do. but when its your heart, you just cant help it. you cant get away from it if you try.

he was left on the streets as a kid, picked up by a Christian man after starving for 4 days on the streets in the projects of new york, and lived in the broom closet of a church for 4 years, eating scraps. he has grow up seeing and living rite in the thick of the need on the streets and answered the call. he is now a man who has picked up children in the streets and orphanages and in the projects, in other countries, for 40 years, and has a Bible club for them 6 days a week. what he does has become world known, but he still choses to live in the worst of the worst in nyc. one boy he just had to bury, was batted to death with a baseball bat by his mom, left to rot in a home, and was found with his little face half eaten by the starving cats in the home. story about story about things he has seen, not nice things that ppl dont like to hear about, that happen, every single day. endless stories of children with aids left to die and how he gets to hug them and lead them to Jesus before they die. he embraces impossible situations not with answers and all the ways to fix things, but sees a need and does something. he has been shot too many times to count. has been stabbed too many times to count. he has has his buildings burned, seen 22 murders up close, been in 3 plane crashes, has held hundreds of children with aids, as they die, and does something. does it pain him more than he can bear? absolutely? should that be a reason to not do something.. absolutely not. he has been called a lunatic, a madman, unwise, unsafe, unstable, etc., etc., BUT, he sees a need and responds. ppl that have reputation, or who are "spiritual" see him as crazy and ridiculous and not godly, bcuz he acts. if he were to die though doing this stuff, he would automatically become a great martyr and or hero of faith. why? ppl, wake up?! live this stuff! you dont have to be "called".. go. do something. open your eyes, cuz its not about you.

he talks about how ppl wait around their whole lives waiting for a "call". or theyll observe need all around them, and "have to pray" about what to do, or there are ppl that dont know what to do, so they do nothing. or he ppl say, well, theres just too much need, where do you start?.. hello?! you start with whats rite in front of you. do something! do you have to know what? no. do something. might you fail? absolutely, but do something. might you be shot? yep.. but do something! but what about the risk of your reputation and pride.. guess what, youre life isnt your own. do something!! get over yourselves, and go be Jesus.

at the end of numbers 16, it talks about how the israelites were all whining and complaining against God and being so disobedient and the Lord had whiped some of them out, and then the ppl started complaining against moses and aaron and how the Lord was fed up and started whiping them out with a plague and was in the process of taking them all out, when aaron all of a sudden, reacted.. didnt think, didnt pray, didnt get a 10 step plan on how to stop things, but he reacted to the need of all the imminent death around him and even though he wasnt sure of whether or not it would work, and didnt have great faith, but just did something, it says in verse 48 that he stood in between the living and the dead and started making intercessions and atonements for them.. when he did this, the plague stopped, and even then, over 14,000 had been killed. but he didnt need to have a "call" to do that. he didnt have to feel lead, or have all this faith.. he just saw a need and did something.. God worked thru that and stopped the plague. aaron had never been trained on what to do in a situation like that.. he was close to 100 years old at this time.. he didnt know that it would work.. but he stood between the living and the dead. 1 person. a nation saved. what would have happened if he did nothing? they would have all been killed..

there are no hopeless cases, just ppl that have no hope. we have a message of hope. a message of life. a message of Jesus Christ, the Saviour, the Redeemer of all men. why are so many ppl blind? yes, welcome to reality of our world, its a bad place and horrible things happen everyday all around us. the need is all around us. what about it? you dont need a "call", you have been called to love. to be an ambassador of Christ. you have been called to give your life for the sake of the gospel, to lay down your rites, to pick up your cross and to loose your life for His sake. that is the call, now go to the need, its not far, just open your eyes. its really simple, but ppl are just to scared and too selfish and say they love.. but how? where? when? is your life more important to you than that person on the street you dont know? where is Jesus in us? if i cant see Him in you, if you cant see Him in me, how is anyone else going to?

like, i obviously have a very passionate little heart, that is devestated for the broken and dangerous and forgotten.. but have been like this since i was 5. i have been told i was crazy. that i go into too dangerous of areas, that i am not "wise", that i am too sensitive, that i am not superwoman, that i cant do it by myself, that i am going to get hurt, that im not living a normal life, that i need to settle down.. and, and, and.. and all i have to say, is, unless you have this sort of heart, you will never understand. it isnt something i can get away from. workin' a 9-5 and havin' a fam isnt my calling. may be part of it.. but that isnt the stuff that is important to me, and that will never take priority in my life. i believe that God wants to love ppl, restore ppl, hug ppl, change ppl, and that He wants us to go into hopeless situations and be His hands and feet and mouth and body. if i have to do it alone, so be it, Jesus is my Lord. these "hopeless" ppl need to be brought hope, how will they believe if they do not hear? how are they to hear unless we/i tell them? if i literally loose my life for the sake of Christ. praise God. im not happy, im not satisfied anyways unless im with these ppl, so why would i be anything less to my heart and Gods heart for them? dont get me wrong, im not a fool, im aware of dangerous situations and am wise in the ways that i need to be, and walk with wisdom, by His Spirit, but sometimes, you must go to the need.. and guess where that is? and not only that, but its not just a need, it is actually a call on my life. i know this is why im created, i have since i was little. so the need is the call, but it just so happens my call is where alot of specific need is. its amazing. i feel alive. and this man just broke my heart with stories, but made it soar as well, bcuz he is living as a fool, and has died to himself so that Christ may reign. its beautiful. someone prophisied over me a couple years back, and this was a woman that didnt even know me from adam, and she prayed over me and for me and all this stuff, but the one thing i remember her saying, was that i was one who went into dangerous situations with boldness and courage and who neednt be afraid. that i was called to go into the areas of brokeness and bring healing, and to go to the "dangerous ppl" without fear, for God was my Defender and Shield. and all this stuff.. that i was one who has the wisdom of a fox, but the gentleness of a dove and that my spirit was very gentle and could bring peace. all this to say, that that was pretty dead on. that i am alive. i keep saying it, and God keeps confirming that to me. that i am crazy. ppl will never understand and look at me like a fool. and praise God.

just please, ppl, open up your eyes. if theres a person in need in front of you, do something. you are there at that moment with that person, not me, so do something. anything. then watch God work. that is why were here. ahh.. what a good nite. i love God.