a man spoke tonite that i have heard before. he is from new york. the last time i heard him speak i was in northern ireland 5 years ago. he has my heart, and thats very rare. he doesnt speak or think like a normal "Christian", but is very real, very in your face and very offensive to those not wanting to see or open their eyes to the real world, or talks about things that arent very uplifting. he is not conventional in his ideas or actions, he just moves. acts. instinctively, bcuz God has placed a calling all around him. the need is his call. as it should be all of ours.
i was crying the whole service and had to leave just as he finished and was walking thru the streets of dublin, tears streaming down my face, so broken, so refreshed at someone speaking and walking and living in the same calling i see on myself. ppl dont understand this dude, what he does, why he does it, why he places himself in the most dangerous situations, they just dont understand. there are very few that do. but when its your heart, you just cant help it. you cant get away from it if you try.
he was left on the streets as a kid, picked up by a Christian man after starving for 4 days on the streets in the projects of new york, and lived in the broom closet of a church for 4 years, eating scraps. he has grow up seeing and living rite in the thick of the need on the streets and answered the call. he is now a man who has picked up children in the streets and orphanages and in the projects, in other countries, for 40 years, and has a Bible club for them 6 days a week. what he does has become world known, but he still choses to live in the worst of the worst in nyc. one boy he just had to bury, was batted to death with a baseball bat by his mom, left to rot in a home, and was found with his little face half eaten by the starving cats in the home. story about story about things he has seen, not nice things that ppl dont like to hear about, that happen, every single day. endless stories of children with aids left to die and how he gets to hug them and lead them to Jesus before they die. he embraces impossible situations not with answers and all the ways to fix things, but sees a need and does something. he has been shot too many times to count. has been stabbed too many times to count. he has has his buildings burned, seen 22 murders up close, been in 3 plane crashes, has held hundreds of children with aids, as they die, and does something. does it pain him more than he can bear? absolutely? should that be a reason to not do something.. absolutely not. he has been called a lunatic, a madman, unwise, unsafe, unstable, etc., etc., BUT, he sees a need and responds. ppl that have reputation, or who are "spiritual" see him as crazy and ridiculous and not godly, bcuz he acts. if he were to die though doing this stuff, he would automatically become a great martyr and or hero of faith. why? ppl, wake up?! live this stuff! you dont have to be "called".. go. do something. open your eyes, cuz its not about you.
he talks about how ppl wait around their whole lives waiting for a "call". or theyll observe need all around them, and "have to pray" about what to do, or there are ppl that dont know what to do, so they do nothing. or he ppl say, well, theres just too much need, where do you start?.. hello?! you start with whats rite in front of you. do something! do you have to know what? no. do something. might you fail? absolutely, but do something. might you be shot? yep.. but do something! but what about the risk of your reputation and pride.. guess what, youre life isnt your own. do something!! get over yourselves, and go be Jesus.
at the end of numbers 16, it talks about how the israelites were all whining and complaining against God and being so disobedient and the Lord had whiped some of them out, and then the ppl started complaining against moses and aaron and how the Lord was fed up and started whiping them out with a plague and was in the process of taking them all out, when aaron all of a sudden, reacted.. didnt think, didnt pray, didnt get a 10 step plan on how to stop things, but he reacted to the need of all the imminent death around him and even though he wasnt sure of whether or not it would work, and didnt have great faith, but just did something, it says in verse 48 that he stood in between the living and the dead and started making intercessions and atonements for them.. when he did this, the plague stopped, and even then, over 14,000 had been killed. but he didnt need to have a "call" to do that. he didnt have to feel lead, or have all this faith.. he just saw a need and did something.. God worked thru that and stopped the plague. aaron had never been trained on what to do in a situation like that.. he was close to 100 years old at this time.. he didnt know that it would work.. but he stood between the living and the dead. 1 person. a nation saved. what would have happened if he did nothing? they would have all been killed..
there are no hopeless cases, just ppl that have no hope. we have a message of hope. a message of life. a message of Jesus Christ, the Saviour, the Redeemer of all men. why are so many ppl blind? yes, welcome to reality of our world, its a bad place and horrible things happen everyday all around us. the need is all around us. what about it? you dont need a "call", you have been called to love. to be an ambassador of Christ. you have been called to give your life for the sake of the gospel, to lay down your rites, to pick up your cross and to loose your life for His sake. that is the call, now go to the need, its not far, just open your eyes. its really simple, but ppl are just to scared and too selfish and say they love.. but how? where? when? is your life more important to you than that person on the street you dont know? where is Jesus in us? if i cant see Him in you, if you cant see Him in me, how is anyone else going to?
like, i obviously have a very passionate little heart, that is devestated for the broken and dangerous and forgotten.. but have been like this since i was 5. i have been told i was crazy. that i go into too dangerous of areas, that i am not "wise", that i am too sensitive, that i am not superwoman, that i cant do it by myself, that i am going to get hurt, that im not living a normal life, that i need to settle down.. and, and, and.. and all i have to say, is, unless you have this sort of heart, you will never understand. it isnt something i can get away from. workin' a 9-5 and havin' a fam isnt my calling. may be part of it.. but that isnt the stuff that is important to me, and that will never take priority in my life. i believe that God wants to love ppl, restore ppl, hug ppl, change ppl, and that He wants us to go into hopeless situations and be His hands and feet and mouth and body. if i have to do it alone, so be it, Jesus is my Lord. these "hopeless" ppl need to be brought hope, how will they believe if they do not hear? how are they to hear unless we/i tell them? if i literally loose my life for the sake of Christ. praise God. im not happy, im not satisfied anyways unless im with these ppl, so why would i be anything less to my heart and Gods heart for them? dont get me wrong, im not a fool, im aware of dangerous situations and am wise in the ways that i need to be, and walk with wisdom, by His Spirit, but sometimes, you must go to the need.. and guess where that is? and not only that, but its not just a need, it is actually a call on my life. i know this is why im created, i have since i was little. so the need is the call, but it just so happens my call is where alot of specific need is. its amazing. i feel alive. and this man just broke my heart with stories, but made it soar as well, bcuz he is living as a fool, and has died to himself so that Christ may reign. its beautiful. someone prophisied over me a couple years back, and this was a woman that didnt even know me from adam, and she prayed over me and for me and all this stuff, but the one thing i remember her saying, was that i was one who went into dangerous situations with boldness and courage and who neednt be afraid. that i was called to go into the areas of brokeness and bring healing, and to go to the "dangerous ppl" without fear, for God was my Defender and Shield. and all this stuff.. that i was one who has the wisdom of a fox, but the gentleness of a dove and that my spirit was very gentle and could bring peace. all this to say, that that was pretty dead on. that i am alive. i keep saying it, and God keeps confirming that to me. that i am crazy. ppl will never understand and look at me like a fool. and praise God.
just please, ppl, open up your eyes. if theres a person in need in front of you, do something. you are there at that moment with that person, not me, so do something. anything. then watch God work. that is why were here. ahh.. what a good nite. i love God.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Friday, January 25, 2008
every time
i am weak. He is strong. every time, i have nothing to offer, He comes and fills me and overflows Himself. everytime i think the worst, 
He tells me to believe the best. every time i feel overwhelmed, He leads me to the Rock that is higher than myself. every time i get discouraged, He comes and moves for His name sake.. tonite was one of those days. was a really stressful day, lots of challenges and obstacles.. and in faith, i praised God for what He was going to do in spite of the mess i saw. it was the most amazing night at choose life. i love these kids, and i can tell God does even more than myself. this was just an amazing night. praise God. i love my kids!!! 
the prayers for these kids are doing so much. i know more than anything else that God brought me here, for such a time as this. for these kids. they are so very precious to His heart and to mine, so thank you for praying for me and for them.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
its the small things
as i was out and about today. i realised, yet again, that it's the small things that make everything worth it. if i just took more time to notice, life would be so much more enjoyable. stuff today:
walking thru a ghetto park, on the windiest day of the year, and having a small girl give me a hug and chat my ear off the whole way back to her home, and seeing the innocence in her eyes.
walking back home, smiling at people waiting at bus stops, and having them smile back.
hearing church bells chime from a church that has been there since 416A.D.
joking with co-workers and hearing people laugh, and know it's real laughter.
being starving, and eating a mandarine, and having it taste like the sweetest treat ever.
giving hugs.
there are just so many to list. beautiful things make me smile and make my heart so happy.
walking thru a ghetto park, on the windiest day of the year, and having a small girl give me a hug and chat my ear off the whole way back to her home, and seeing the innocence in her eyes.
walking back home, smiling at people waiting at bus stops, and having them smile back.
hearing church bells chime from a church that has been there since 416A.D.
joking with co-workers and hearing people laugh, and know it's real laughter.
being starving, and eating a mandarine, and having it taste like the sweetest treat ever.
giving hugs.
there are just so many to list. beautiful things make me smile and make my heart so happy.
Saturday, January 19, 2008
soaked!
i don't know if life could get any better. more and more i realise God's purpose in creating me. that sounds quite wierd, most likely, but if you think about it, it's not.. i was designed to share the excellent qualities of God, and am fully lost in His purposes for me, and i couldn't be happier. how many ppl actually get to live out their purpose, and feel fully alive?.. i realised after hangin' out with 150 homeless men and women tonite, and standing on the street in the pouring rain for 2 hours talking with someone about Jesus, and every thing from titanic, to stalin, to the aero-dynamic of flight in birds, that ppl just need to be listened to. you can pray for joe. joe is a man i met tonite at the end of our nite at the homeless shelter, after standing in front of 150 ppl and talking and hangin' out with them, and after the meals were finished and everything was being cleaned.. after shaking the hands of drug addicts and having real conversations with people with aids and addicted to heroine, and giving little boys who live on the streets hugs.. i feel fully alive, and that everything i was created for and totally at home by being surrounded by the most messed up, broken ppl of this world, who are passed out on our floor from alcohol and drugs, who are fighting and cursing like there is no tomorrow and have absolutely nothing. i love them. i just love them. i just hug them and talk to them and nothing else matters but loving them and showing Jesus to them. i could never get paid again and wear a big plastic bag for the rest of my life if just for the moments to spend with these ppl.. and this man joe and i started talking rite at the end of the nite, he wanted a clean shirt.. i told him, i didnt have one, but that i was so sorry and would see what i could do. we got talking.. one of the most intelligent men i have ever talked to, and one of the most broken men, from heroine, and nicotine and alcohol, and nite terrors.. he knew more about the Bible than me, and it was so amazing.. cuz i just let him talk and parts of our conversation were the most random things i have ever talked about, and things i hadnt a clue about.. and yet, the man just needed someone to listen to him.. he even said.. this world has no time for ppl like me, and yet, it seems like you have all the time in the world.. how are you like that? why do you care? you have a heart of gold.. ppl like you are very rare, he goes, i couldnt talk to any of me mates about this kind of stuff even, no one cares, but you do, why?.. and i got to share the gospel with him.. i got to tell him that that was Jesus in me.. and we talked about the hardships and the realities of this messed up world and the Spirit just lead and i asked to pray for him, and then we talked till we got kicked out, and we walked in the town for ages in the pouring rain, as this man just poured out his heart. (now this is a man in his 60's, sharing his whole life!!), and yet, the Spirit just moved, and we talked about Jesus, outside, in the pouring rain, getting soaked.. and yet.. it was the most amazing nite.. in those moments, nothing mattered, but this man knowing Jesus, i told him he had a decision, and the only decision in life he needed to make was where and how he wanted to spend eternity.. the gospel, satan, heaven, hell, the life of Christ.. verses were coming out of no where.. i say this not to boast, but to say that God wants to save ppl.. that He wants to make Himself known to the ppl of this world that have nothing.. He came and chose to be born in bethlehem, in stable, in a jewish home.. he choose a life of lower than average wealth, no status, nothing in His appearance that we should desire Him, He hung out with the ppl of this world, and was called a wine-o and a glutton and friend of sinners.. why did He choose to hang out with these ppl? cuz He loves them. He had eternal life, the Words of life to offer them.. they would listen.. He gave them all the time in the world.. He didnt have status, He wasnt attractive physically, He related to the lowest form of ppl in that time.. and they were attracted to Him, bcuz He looked at them and loved them. as i was telling joe this, he got it.. so please pray for Him.. pray for the Words that the Spirit spoke thru me, to take root in His heart.. pray for salvation, thru grace, by faith alone, would come to this man..
as i stood there, mascara running down my face.. hair in a mess of wind and rain.. drenched and looking ridiculous to all the cars driving by as i stood there with this clearly homeless man that smelled, someone that no one would ever notice.. i realised that that is why i, very specifically, am alive.. i could care less how i look, or dont look.. this, very specifically, is why i am here.. my life is not my own, and praise God, becuz i am fully alive! i know im kind of all over the place on this one, but i just have so much on my mind.. the things this world considers important; wealth, status, looks, accomplishments, etc.. are nothing.. they mean nothing, they are all completly meaningless.. what lasts is loosing our lives for the sake of the kingdom.. loving the broken, crucifying ourselves and loving ppl. i dont want to hang out with attractive ppl that have it all together, i dont care about money or looks or ppl with careers, or the "perfect" ppl in churches, or anything like that.. the more i live, the more i realise that i am home, when i am with the broken. the drug addicts, homeless and the street ppl.. not necassarily just youth, cuz i love the 4 year old boy who is a drug baby just as much as i do the 80 year old blind man addicted to cocaine. God is just blowing my mind and allowing me to come fully alive in Him.. what an abundant life.. truely! my prayer for each one of you all is that as you fall more in love with Jesus, that His heart would be your heart, and that you would fall into the things you are created for.. cuz each one of us are.. you dont necessarily love to hang out with homeless ppl, thats why God created me.. i dont necessarily like to do the things you feel alive at.. the body of Christ is brilliant like that.. we are all so free to be ourselves, just as Christ created us to be in Him and it all works out.. its just amazing.. i could give all these scriptures and go all over the board with this blog.. but i wont, i just had to write.. cuz i was so excited to be found.. found in Him.. and so excited about joe.. pray for joe.. thanks you guys.. i know im a spaz.. but hey, i am a spaz in the Lord who just loves ppl.. praise God! love you all.
as i stood there, mascara running down my face.. hair in a mess of wind and rain.. drenched and looking ridiculous to all the cars driving by as i stood there with this clearly homeless man that smelled, someone that no one would ever notice.. i realised that that is why i, very specifically, am alive.. i could care less how i look, or dont look.. this, very specifically, is why i am here.. my life is not my own, and praise God, becuz i am fully alive! i know im kind of all over the place on this one, but i just have so much on my mind.. the things this world considers important; wealth, status, looks, accomplishments, etc.. are nothing.. they mean nothing, they are all completly meaningless.. what lasts is loosing our lives for the sake of the kingdom.. loving the broken, crucifying ourselves and loving ppl. i dont want to hang out with attractive ppl that have it all together, i dont care about money or looks or ppl with careers, or the "perfect" ppl in churches, or anything like that.. the more i live, the more i realise that i am home, when i am with the broken. the drug addicts, homeless and the street ppl.. not necassarily just youth, cuz i love the 4 year old boy who is a drug baby just as much as i do the 80 year old blind man addicted to cocaine. God is just blowing my mind and allowing me to come fully alive in Him.. what an abundant life.. truely! my prayer for each one of you all is that as you fall more in love with Jesus, that His heart would be your heart, and that you would fall into the things you are created for.. cuz each one of us are.. you dont necessarily love to hang out with homeless ppl, thats why God created me.. i dont necessarily like to do the things you feel alive at.. the body of Christ is brilliant like that.. we are all so free to be ourselves, just as Christ created us to be in Him and it all works out.. its just amazing.. i could give all these scriptures and go all over the board with this blog.. but i wont, i just had to write.. cuz i was so excited to be found.. found in Him.. and so excited about joe.. pray for joe.. thanks you guys.. i know im a spaz.. but hey, i am a spaz in the Lord who just loves ppl.. praise God! love you all.
Friday, January 18, 2008
pajama/teddy bear party
this was the first club that i have had to lead officially since the couple i was working with, went on sabbatical. it was amazing. God was totally faithful, brought every girl to our club, without a bus to pick them up, which is what has happened for years, and the whole nite just had God's hand on it in everyway.
i can say it's my fave group of kids here.. we had such a good time, and every detail of the nite was just so awesome. praise God.. 
here's some pics of our hall and of last nite. praise God, He has a huge plan that i'm just goin' along with, it's so great..
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
spotlight
theres a magazine the mission publishes every 3 months that goes to all their uk supporters.. well, i wrote an article back in september after just having been here a wee bit, and they put it online.. heres the link, just scroll down a couple pages in the mag and youll see my little article. just thought id put it in case anyone was interested. bless.
http://www.dcmlive.ie/Sept%2007.pdf
http://www.dcmlive.ie/Sept%2007.pdf
Monday, January 14, 2008
whoa!!!!!
as i keep reading and listening the Lord is really so clearly trying to say, "you are going to heaven!" its like someone shaking me, like, hello?! are you getting this? there is joy! glory! Me! inheratence! all waiting for you.. live as though my kingdom is here. now. this world and the things in it are rotting, they are utterly being given over to death as i speak. they are rubbish! live as a citizen of the kingdom of heaven, now! bring my kingdom to this earth today.
"therefore since we are receiving a kingdom which can not be shaken, let us have grace, by which we may serve God acceptably with reverence and godly fear. for our God is a consuming fire." hebrews 12:28-29
a kingdom that can not be shaken. a King that is all consuming, that will burn up everything not done for the sake of His kingdom. the wood, stubble, and hay that are our works of flesh will be destroyed; only that cup of cold water given in His name, the loving the orphans and widows, and defending the cause of the poor and broken and truley surrendering ourselves wholly to the sake of the Kingdom and walking in obedience to what He is calling us to do, that is all that will last.
"but you have come to mount zion and to the city of the Living God, the heavenly jerusalem, to an innummerable company of angels, to the general assembly and church of the firstborn who are registered in heaven, to God the Judge of all, to the spirits of men made perfect, to Jesus the Mediator of the new covenant, and to the blood of sprinkling that speaks better things than that of abel.." hebrews 12:22-24
whoa.. read it slow.. read every word and let His Spirit speak. whoa..
rite now, Jesus is King. Jesus has, at this very moment, complete sovreignty and authority over all things. He is King. He is Lord, "therefore God has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus, every knee will bow, those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of the Father." (phil 2:11) we have a King. we have authority as current citizens of heaven, at this very moment, and we are to walk in that authority to the glory of God.
"if then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is sitting at the rite hand of God. set your mind on things above, not on things on earth. for you died, and your life is hidden with Christ, in God. when He, who is our life, appears, then you will also appear with Him in glory." col. 3:1-4
our King is not of this world, for, "He will not judge by what he sees with His eyes, or decide by what He hears with Hisears; but with righteousness He will judge the needy, with justice
He will give decisions for the poor of the earth. He will strike the earth with the rod of His mouth; with the breath of his lips he will slay the wicked. righteousness will be his belt and faithfulness the sash around his waist." isa. 11:3b-5
powerful! "to Him who loved us, and washed us from our sins in His own blood, and has made us kings and priests to His God and Father, to Him be the glory and dominion forever and ever. amen. behold, He is coming with clouds, and every eye will see Him, even they who pierced Him. and all the tribes of the earth shall mourn bcuz of Him. even so. amen. I AM the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End, says the Lord, who was and is and who is to come, the Almighty." rev. 1:5-8
whoa.. "and in the midst of the seven golden lampstands One like the Son of Man, clothed with a garment down to the feet and girded about the chest with a golden band. His head and hair were while like wool, as white as snow, and His eyes like a flame of fire; His feet were like fine brass, as if refined in a furnace, and His voice as the sound of many waters; He had in His rite hand 7 starts, out of His mouth went a sharp two-edged sword, and His countenance was like the sun shining in strength. and when i saw Him i fell at His feet as dead. but He laid His rite hand on me, saying to me, 'do not be afraid; I AM the First and the Last. i am He who lives, and was dead, and behold, I am alive forevermore. amen. and i have the keys of hades and death." rev. 1:13-18
whoa... seriously? this is my reality? this is what and where my eyes and my heart should be constantly straining to see and be a part of, since my heart is already there? and i get so easily distracted by the stupid stuff this world has to offer? what is going on?! oh that the Lord would give us all eyes to see and yearning hearts for this Kingdom. that while we are on this earth, we would strive with our entire hearts for His kingdom and His righteousness, for He does say that, "blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled." matt. 5:6
"for the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of an archangel, and wiht the trumpet call of God. and the dead in Christ will rise first. then we who are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. and thus we shall be with the Lord. therefore, encourage one another with these words." 1 thes. 4:16-18
"behold, I am coming quickly, and My reward is with me to give everyone according to His work." rev. 22:12
"and i heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "now the dwelling of God is with men, and He will live with them. they will be his people, and God Himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. there will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." He who was seated on the throne said, "I am making everything new!" then He said, "write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true." He said to me: "it is done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. to him who is thirsty I will give to drink without cost from the spring of the water of life. He who overcomes will inherit all this, and I will be his God and he will be my son." rev. 21:3-7
may your hearts be encouraged as you look to our king. the scriptures speak for themselves.
"therefore since we are receiving a kingdom which can not be shaken, let us have grace, by which we may serve God acceptably with reverence and godly fear. for our God is a consuming fire." hebrews 12:28-29
a kingdom that can not be shaken. a King that is all consuming, that will burn up everything not done for the sake of His kingdom. the wood, stubble, and hay that are our works of flesh will be destroyed; only that cup of cold water given in His name, the loving the orphans and widows, and defending the cause of the poor and broken and truley surrendering ourselves wholly to the sake of the Kingdom and walking in obedience to what He is calling us to do, that is all that will last.
"but you have come to mount zion and to the city of the Living God, the heavenly jerusalem, to an innummerable company of angels, to the general assembly and church of the firstborn who are registered in heaven, to God the Judge of all, to the spirits of men made perfect, to Jesus the Mediator of the new covenant, and to the blood of sprinkling that speaks better things than that of abel.." hebrews 12:22-24
whoa.. read it slow.. read every word and let His Spirit speak. whoa..
rite now, Jesus is King. Jesus has, at this very moment, complete sovreignty and authority over all things. He is King. He is Lord, "therefore God has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus, every knee will bow, those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of the Father." (phil 2:11) we have a King. we have authority as current citizens of heaven, at this very moment, and we are to walk in that authority to the glory of God.
"if then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is sitting at the rite hand of God. set your mind on things above, not on things on earth. for you died, and your life is hidden with Christ, in God. when He, who is our life, appears, then you will also appear with Him in glory." col. 3:1-4
our King is not of this world, for, "He will not judge by what he sees with His eyes, or decide by what He hears with Hisears; but with righteousness He will judge the needy, with justice
He will give decisions for the poor of the earth. He will strike the earth with the rod of His mouth; with the breath of his lips he will slay the wicked. righteousness will be his belt and faithfulness the sash around his waist." isa. 11:3b-5
powerful! "to Him who loved us, and washed us from our sins in His own blood, and has made us kings and priests to His God and Father, to Him be the glory and dominion forever and ever. amen. behold, He is coming with clouds, and every eye will see Him, even they who pierced Him. and all the tribes of the earth shall mourn bcuz of Him. even so. amen. I AM the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End, says the Lord, who was and is and who is to come, the Almighty." rev. 1:5-8
whoa.. "and in the midst of the seven golden lampstands One like the Son of Man, clothed with a garment down to the feet and girded about the chest with a golden band. His head and hair were while like wool, as white as snow, and His eyes like a flame of fire; His feet were like fine brass, as if refined in a furnace, and His voice as the sound of many waters; He had in His rite hand 7 starts, out of His mouth went a sharp two-edged sword, and His countenance was like the sun shining in strength. and when i saw Him i fell at His feet as dead. but He laid His rite hand on me, saying to me, 'do not be afraid; I AM the First and the Last. i am He who lives, and was dead, and behold, I am alive forevermore. amen. and i have the keys of hades and death." rev. 1:13-18
whoa... seriously? this is my reality? this is what and where my eyes and my heart should be constantly straining to see and be a part of, since my heart is already there? and i get so easily distracted by the stupid stuff this world has to offer? what is going on?! oh that the Lord would give us all eyes to see and yearning hearts for this Kingdom. that while we are on this earth, we would strive with our entire hearts for His kingdom and His righteousness, for He does say that, "blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled." matt. 5:6
"for the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of an archangel, and wiht the trumpet call of God. and the dead in Christ will rise first. then we who are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. and thus we shall be with the Lord. therefore, encourage one another with these words." 1 thes. 4:16-18
"behold, I am coming quickly, and My reward is with me to give everyone according to His work." rev. 22:12
"and i heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "now the dwelling of God is with men, and He will live with them. they will be his people, and God Himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. there will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." He who was seated on the throne said, "I am making everything new!" then He said, "write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true." He said to me: "it is done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. to him who is thirsty I will give to drink without cost from the spring of the water of life. He who overcomes will inherit all this, and I will be his God and he will be my son." rev. 21:3-7
may your hearts be encouraged as you look to our king. the scriptures speak for themselves.
this makes my life make sense
"trust in the Lord with all of your heart, lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths." proverbs 3:5 &6
the simplicity and profoundness of this blows my mind. what a promise!
thank you God!
Thursday, January 10, 2008
im so glad
that feelings are different than reality in the Lord sometimes.
all week i have felt so overwhelemed, so in over my head, so discouraged and inadequate. like a grasshopper in the midst of giants. yet, i know that my feelings get the better of me sometimes, i know myself, i know this, so i have done my absolute best to cling to truth, to rejoice in the unknown, the unseen, and in who and what i know to be true of my God. i cling with my life to His Words, His promises and trust Him, in faith, believing that in my weak state of having no clue what is going on, that God's purposes for Himself are greater than my fears of being the wrong person for this huge task.
so. i pray. i keep praying. i do my best to rest. to stop thinking..
and tonite i got the most encouraging phone call.. like, i have had to convince myself all week, in faith, that God is gonna do crazy and amazing things, cuz its so overwhelming, and have had to trust that He has called me to this, so i can just trust Him to take care of the finer, scary details.. i have felt so out of my league here lately for what i know is coming.. so, tonite, someone called me and just spoke a very well timed word to me of who God has made me and what He is calling me to and for, and it was just so aptly spoken, and i felt God reassuring me that its ok.. and i am convinced in my mind, and my heart now.. (which means that i can feel it now).. that He is so able to do the impossible. that He is going to do something so great, and i am so excited.. earlier it was dread, tonite, i am so encouraged and so excited to see what God is going to do! He is amazing. He is releasing me to great things in His name, for His kingdom, that i just have to receive in faith, and lots of prayer. im terrified.. but its the adrenaline kind that means its time to kick into gear and go with all this craziness HE has planned.. have no idea. no clue. absoluetly no freakin' idea what He's doing.. but its big. huge. so much more than i can ask or imagine, but, by His power, for His glory, He is going to do it, becuz He is more than able. and i just gotta go with it. what a stress reliever, huh? praise God..
im pretty sure its gonna be a daily thing, that this encouragement for today, and tonite is just enough for today and tonite, and tmrw i will have to come before Him, and the next day, and the next.. that He is just enough, for what i need.. oh, that i will stay very close to His heart, His voice, and His Word everyday.. and that my daily "manna" and bread would be more than enough for that day. God is amazing.
all week i have felt so overwhelemed, so in over my head, so discouraged and inadequate. like a grasshopper in the midst of giants. yet, i know that my feelings get the better of me sometimes, i know myself, i know this, so i have done my absolute best to cling to truth, to rejoice in the unknown, the unseen, and in who and what i know to be true of my God. i cling with my life to His Words, His promises and trust Him, in faith, believing that in my weak state of having no clue what is going on, that God's purposes for Himself are greater than my fears of being the wrong person for this huge task.
so. i pray. i keep praying. i do my best to rest. to stop thinking..
and tonite i got the most encouraging phone call.. like, i have had to convince myself all week, in faith, that God is gonna do crazy and amazing things, cuz its so overwhelming, and have had to trust that He has called me to this, so i can just trust Him to take care of the finer, scary details.. i have felt so out of my league here lately for what i know is coming.. so, tonite, someone called me and just spoke a very well timed word to me of who God has made me and what He is calling me to and for, and it was just so aptly spoken, and i felt God reassuring me that its ok.. and i am convinced in my mind, and my heart now.. (which means that i can feel it now).. that He is so able to do the impossible. that He is going to do something so great, and i am so excited.. earlier it was dread, tonite, i am so encouraged and so excited to see what God is going to do! He is amazing. He is releasing me to great things in His name, for His kingdom, that i just have to receive in faith, and lots of prayer. im terrified.. but its the adrenaline kind that means its time to kick into gear and go with all this craziness HE has planned.. have no idea. no clue. absoluetly no freakin' idea what He's doing.. but its big. huge. so much more than i can ask or imagine, but, by His power, for His glory, He is going to do it, becuz He is more than able. and i just gotta go with it. what a stress reliever, huh? praise God..
im pretty sure its gonna be a daily thing, that this encouragement for today, and tonite is just enough for today and tonite, and tmrw i will have to come before Him, and the next day, and the next.. that He is just enough, for what i need.. oh, that i will stay very close to His heart, His voice, and His Word everyday.. and that my daily "manna" and bread would be more than enough for that day. God is amazing.
Monday, January 7, 2008
foolishness. lowliness. etc.
so, as i was soul angsting today, as the previous email shows, i sat down on my futon, after a long nite of trying to find everything to do to occupy my time and mind, cuz it was so jumbled and disorganised, that i just didnt want to think anymore.. or at all, really.. so i watched some tv., played online a bit, talked to friends, tried to see if any of my kids were free.. and nothing was helping. in the back of my mind i felt a tug of something, (God), calling me to read His Word, to come to Him, to stop for 5 seconds and let Him say something to me.. to focus.. i ignored it.. played more online, talked to my roomate.. ate food.. did nothing, and did it for quite some time, until the feeling just wouldnt go away.
so i sat down, the futon again, and had my Bible and my cell phone, and my regular phone and a blanket and tried really hard to be spiritual and have it all figured out.. cuz, of course, everythings in the Bible, rite? and i know enough truth to try and make myself feel better.. so, i sit there, frustrated cuz im so angsty inside, and a good definition for that would be... like soul confused/messed up/ok/distracted/denial/discontent/unrest/not sure what im feeling, etc.. and so here i sit, even more frustrated cuz i just didnt know how to fix myself.. grr.. so i sit.. and vent to God, and just keep venting, coming before Him as i am, not as i would like, or as i wanted, or as other ppl saw, but coming before Him frustrated and confused and needy and... as i did.. His Holy Spirit came. His presence came. He came and just was with me. and listened. and loved and comforted and let me be. and i opened up to 1 corinthians. chapter 1 and into chapter 3 i read.
and as i read, i began to cry. realising how paralysed my soul was from fear. God started to reveal to me that i was completly so afraid of failing at this humongous task that was in front of me, and that i was paralysed. my soul angst was from this fear that had me bound to the point where i couldnt even move.. and as i began to pray.. God began to release that fear. and as i read and prayed and listened in the moments of stillness and silence i had given Him, i kept reading this..
brothers, think of what you were when you were called. not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. but God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. it is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. therefore, as it is written: "let him who boasts boast in the Lord." i cor. 1:26-31
hmm.. so i thought.. were is my failing going to come from if im trusting in Gods power alone?
then i read..
"we have the mind of Christ." 1 cor. 2:16
hmm.. ok, peace is flooding in.. and then, i read..
"don't you know that you yourselves are God's temple and that God's Spirit lives in you?" 1 cor. 3:16
and for some reason, God flooded my heart with these truths of who i am in Him, that i am nothing apart from Him.. that its fear that was paralysing me and truth that is setting me free..
so.. needless to say, its been a trying day.. and God is faithfully pursuing my heart, mind and soul, and giving me peace that is out of this world.. by truth, His Word His truth, He is the Word, He is the truth, and therein lies my freedom. its crazy.. its good.. praise God.. thru faith.. for freedom and peace.. amen.
so i sat down, the futon again, and had my Bible and my cell phone, and my regular phone and a blanket and tried really hard to be spiritual and have it all figured out.. cuz, of course, everythings in the Bible, rite? and i know enough truth to try and make myself feel better.. so, i sit there, frustrated cuz im so angsty inside, and a good definition for that would be... like soul confused/messed up/ok/distracted/denial/discontent/unrest/not sure what im feeling, etc.. and so here i sit, even more frustrated cuz i just didnt know how to fix myself.. grr.. so i sit.. and vent to God, and just keep venting, coming before Him as i am, not as i would like, or as i wanted, or as other ppl saw, but coming before Him frustrated and confused and needy and... as i did.. His Holy Spirit came. His presence came. He came and just was with me. and listened. and loved and comforted and let me be. and i opened up to 1 corinthians. chapter 1 and into chapter 3 i read.
and as i read, i began to cry. realising how paralysed my soul was from fear. God started to reveal to me that i was completly so afraid of failing at this humongous task that was in front of me, and that i was paralysed. my soul angst was from this fear that had me bound to the point where i couldnt even move.. and as i began to pray.. God began to release that fear. and as i read and prayed and listened in the moments of stillness and silence i had given Him, i kept reading this..
brothers, think of what you were when you were called. not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. but God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. it is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. therefore, as it is written: "let him who boasts boast in the Lord." i cor. 1:26-31
hmm.. so i thought.. were is my failing going to come from if im trusting in Gods power alone?
then i read..
"we have the mind of Christ." 1 cor. 2:16
hmm.. ok, peace is flooding in.. and then, i read..
"don't you know that you yourselves are God's temple and that God's Spirit lives in you?" 1 cor. 3:16
and for some reason, God flooded my heart with these truths of who i am in Him, that i am nothing apart from Him.. that its fear that was paralysing me and truth that is setting me free..
so.. needless to say, its been a trying day.. and God is faithfully pursuing my heart, mind and soul, and giving me peace that is out of this world.. by truth, His Word His truth, He is the Word, He is the truth, and therein lies my freedom. its crazy.. its good.. praise God.. thru faith.. for freedom and peace.. amen.
today
"why are you downcast, o my soul? why so disturbed within me? put your hope in God, for i will yet praise him, my Savior and my God." psalm 42:11
like david, this, today, my soul cries, and sighs... then i am reminded that:
"the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies." (rom. 8:22-23)
i remember that i am a foreigner here, and just passing thru, that i am a stranger and an alien to this world. (1 pet. 2:11) and that there is an intense battle going on for my heart.
i remember too that i am promised victory,
"thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. let nothing move you. always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain." (1 cor. 15:57-58)
so, i wait for my King to deliver me. i stand firm, and with a very heavy heart, conisider the things of the Lord and trudge on in the strength of my Saviour.
so, i rejoice. i sigh. and i wait for the salvation of the Lord. come Lord Jesus.
please pray for my heart, mind and soul. for protection. grace. truth and immense peace. that i would know His presence and purposes and His tenderness as He has called me to this for the time being. thanks guys.
shawnda
like david, this, today, my soul cries, and sighs... then i am reminded that:
"the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies." (rom. 8:22-23)
i remember that i am a foreigner here, and just passing thru, that i am a stranger and an alien to this world. (1 pet. 2:11) and that there is an intense battle going on for my heart.
i remember too that i am promised victory,
"thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. let nothing move you. always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain." (1 cor. 15:57-58)
so, i wait for my King to deliver me. i stand firm, and with a very heavy heart, conisider the things of the Lord and trudge on in the strength of my Saviour.
so, i rejoice. i sigh. and i wait for the salvation of the Lord. come Lord Jesus.
please pray for my heart, mind and soul. for protection. grace. truth and immense peace. that i would know His presence and purposes and His tenderness as He has called me to this for the time being. thanks guys.
shawnda
the madness begins
hey, everything about the rest of the year being crazy and all that God has planned, that nobody has a clue about, starts today.. pray for wisdom, courage, strength and peace as God does His thing thru me. i need all the prayers i can get.. thanks everyone.
Saturday, January 5, 2008
Friday, January 4, 2008
changes. prayers.
so, since i have been here, i have been working alongside a couple who have worked in drimnagh now for almost 10 years. these ppl are amazing, they give up every hour of every one of their days, serving the families in the community and giving so much of themselves, that the impact they have had in this community is so vital and necessary. we work with some of the most broken, drug-addicted, poor families, who are in and out of hospitals and prisons like there is no tmrw.
they are the drivers to get our kids into town for our club, they do so much more than anyone else here, and they are so vitally important to this mission, and 3 weeks ago, they told us that they needed to resign, that after 10 years, they are just so worn out and exhausted, and have nothing left to offer and need time away to get a new vision, to spend time with God, and basically, get re-oriented. well, billy, our director, gave them an alternative instead of resigning, to go on a sabbatical. which means that, after today, its just me in drimnagh and crumlin for the next 3 and a half months. this is really good for them, and were all supportive of them, and happy that they are making a healthy decision for their hearts, rather than burning out, which would be the next step. but, it leaves many unanswered questions, and alot of things that will have to change.. alot. it means that i am the leader, not only of choose life now, but, am lookin' out for drimnagh and crumlin.. two very large, very poor, very needy communities. no one really knows what all it means, but have complete confidence that i am here, very specifically for such a time as this, and am "well able" for the next 7 months, by trusting in God alone, and walking by the Spirit.
now. i knew from the beginning that God brought me here specifically for this estate, i wrote about that months ago, and ive known God's peace and contentment and provision in abundance, since i have been here. i am not worried, but am fully confident that i have no idea what the next step is. i am very assured that things will change, that i have been called to a very great task, and that i havent a clue. this is a good place to be. listening to God. keeping my eyes focused on Him, His kingdom, His rule and reign and Lord-ship of my life, and listening with intent and purpose for what lies ahead. not having expectations from the mission put on me, cuz they dont even know, becuz its such a huge change, is good. being completly surrendered to God, is good. it is literally the only way i am surviving. and God has been daily giving me so much strength and peace and contentment, in the midst of this, that is amazing. He is doing something great, and for some reason, He has chosen to use me at this time to lead a people unto Himself.. 2 huge communities!
this could be so overwhelming to me, but.. God is very graciously assuring me, daily, that He alone is the one that is in control, that this is nothing shocking to His sovreignty, and that the thing for which He is calling me to is great, but that He is greater and He will provide everything that i need in the midst.
so, your prayers would be fantastic. here i am, directly in the middle of something that is so much greater than i know, and have been called to this. whoa. so. i have no idea what you can be praying for. wisdom. peace. strength. that i would stay very close to God's heart. that i would have ears to hear, and the courage to do it, would be a good start, i guess.
i dont know. im in way over my head on this one. and yet, God is the One who has called me very specifically to it, so i trust Him and just go with Him.
prayers. please. it will be cool to see what God has in store til July, cuz no one has a clue. good thing He is out for His own glory. He will work and will move.. so, it begins.
God bless.
they are the drivers to get our kids into town for our club, they do so much more than anyone else here, and they are so vitally important to this mission, and 3 weeks ago, they told us that they needed to resign, that after 10 years, they are just so worn out and exhausted, and have nothing left to offer and need time away to get a new vision, to spend time with God, and basically, get re-oriented. well, billy, our director, gave them an alternative instead of resigning, to go on a sabbatical. which means that, after today, its just me in drimnagh and crumlin for the next 3 and a half months. this is really good for them, and were all supportive of them, and happy that they are making a healthy decision for their hearts, rather than burning out, which would be the next step. but, it leaves many unanswered questions, and alot of things that will have to change.. alot. it means that i am the leader, not only of choose life now, but, am lookin' out for drimnagh and crumlin.. two very large, very poor, very needy communities. no one really knows what all it means, but have complete confidence that i am here, very specifically for such a time as this, and am "well able" for the next 7 months, by trusting in God alone, and walking by the Spirit.
now. i knew from the beginning that God brought me here specifically for this estate, i wrote about that months ago, and ive known God's peace and contentment and provision in abundance, since i have been here. i am not worried, but am fully confident that i have no idea what the next step is. i am very assured that things will change, that i have been called to a very great task, and that i havent a clue. this is a good place to be. listening to God. keeping my eyes focused on Him, His kingdom, His rule and reign and Lord-ship of my life, and listening with intent and purpose for what lies ahead. not having expectations from the mission put on me, cuz they dont even know, becuz its such a huge change, is good. being completly surrendered to God, is good. it is literally the only way i am surviving. and God has been daily giving me so much strength and peace and contentment, in the midst of this, that is amazing. He is doing something great, and for some reason, He has chosen to use me at this time to lead a people unto Himself.. 2 huge communities!
this could be so overwhelming to me, but.. God is very graciously assuring me, daily, that He alone is the one that is in control, that this is nothing shocking to His sovreignty, and that the thing for which He is calling me to is great, but that He is greater and He will provide everything that i need in the midst.
so, your prayers would be fantastic. here i am, directly in the middle of something that is so much greater than i know, and have been called to this. whoa. so. i have no idea what you can be praying for. wisdom. peace. strength. that i would stay very close to God's heart. that i would have ears to hear, and the courage to do it, would be a good start, i guess.
i dont know. im in way over my head on this one. and yet, God is the One who has called me very specifically to it, so i trust Him and just go with Him.
prayers. please. it will be cool to see what God has in store til July, cuz no one has a clue. good thing He is out for His own glory. He will work and will move.. so, it begins.
God bless.
Thursday, January 3, 2008
snow!
yay! we looked out the window during out meetings today and it was snowing. fair enough, it was for like 15 minutes and now it's done, but.. it snowed!! very cool.
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
!!!scotland!!!
happy new years!! its been awhile since ive written an update, and bcuz of that, i have soo much to write about, but will make it as short and sweet as possible. so.. over i spent Christmas and that whole week up in northern ireland with some friend and families that i know.. was brilliant.. was amazing, i could write a book about it, but am going to focus this email on my trip to scotland.so, my roomate and i found tickets for 20 euro to fly to scotland for 4 days.. booked them, and then realised that we knew nothing about scotland, didnt know anyone there, and had not a clue where we were going to stay or what we were going to do.. off we took at 4am on friday
morning.. and get there only to realise i forgot my stuff i need to fly. i have nerve damage in my cheek that happened this last year after my nose surgery, that makes it excruciatingly painful for me to fly and the specialist doctor gave me all these perscriptions and stuff i need to take in order for it not to be horrific. well, i forgot them. so here i am at the airport.. in absolute fear. we start to pra
y. and keep praying about the whole weekend, cuz pretty much, our adventurous little souls had just booked tickets to some country over the busiest weekend possible and hadnt a clue.. so.. may i just say, God is so good.. as you read about the trip, you have to understand, that every second of our entire trip was directed and looked after by God. we did and saw things that we could not have planned better if we had tried and got to be a part of things that caused our mouths to be stuck open in awe the entire trip, without exaggeration, it was completly crazy to see the hand of God in everything we did. 
so, were are about to go thru security, only to realise how huge our bags were, and we werent going to check them, so again prayed, and we got thru with out an eyebrow being raised. (God is amazing) then, board the flight, get the exit row seats, meaning all the room in front of us in the world.. and 50 minutes later were in glasgow, a perfect, somehow completly pain free flight, not even the slightest problem. (glory to God), we arrive and are in this huge, beautiful city.. we found our hostel rite in the middle of town (amazing), left our stuff and away we went. snapped pics every 5 minutes, and looked around in amazement as policemen on horses were all over the place, and ppl sounding like mike myers on shrek were everywhere.. there were dudes in kilts everywhere..
and so we grabbed a map and off we went.. orientated ourselves to the city and walked around literally for about 12 hours.. ended up finding the biggest festival in glasgow, got in for free.. met amazing people (with the coolest accent i have ever heard).. and just had a pain free, rain free, gorgeous day exploring. our hostel was brilliant, we were in with 16 other ppl, and instead of being stuck in a room where everyone came in drunk and loud on a friday nite, we had all 14 other ppl in bed by 10pm on a friday nite! (which was amazing for us cuz we were takin off the next mrng early for edinburgh), was brilliant. (glory to God).
THEN
we got up, had a free, huge breakfast, provided by the hostel, (amazing in itself).. then "just happened" to be rite on time for the bus to edinburgh. in we go. its pouring rain, the entire way to edinburgh.. which, was a beautiful drive.. the scottish highlands are like something out of braveheart (probably cuz it was filmed there, but it actually is like that), was so beautiful.. so, rain, rain and more rain.. and then we arrive in edinburgh, and the moment we step out of the bus, it stopped, and the clouds went and this gorgeous sun came out. we were like this is not going to last long, and yet.. the entire day. bright, gorgeous sun, with a beautiful sunset (again.. thanks God!!).. so, we get out.. have our huge bags, and all the suverneirs we had bought in glasgow and were standing in the middle of edinburgh city centre and didnt move. both of us were literally standing there, mouths open, cameras out, and poking each other, going, samaria look.. shawnda look..
were in the city, and up on the hill is a cliff, with a huge castle on it.. then as you keep looking, theres these medeval/gothic style buildings everywhere, and every building, monument, church, bank, and everything looked like a castle. everything was made of stone, that was stained black from all the chimney smoke, and there was a river dividing the city.. and literally, i cant even descibe it, but it was the most grandeur place i have ever been. we just stood there. not moving more than a 360 degree turn with our heads and cameras. it smelt amazing, cuz there was this huge festival going on. and all you see were castles and kilts, and all you can hear was bagpipes, from all the guys on the streets playing them.
ok, so this is our first 10 minutes there, we knew it was going to be a good day.. again, having no clue where we were.. we asked someone for directions to our hostel, (and in their very cool accent), we get told its rite up on the hill (rite next to the castle!!!) (God's amazing)
so, up we traunt,
stopping every 3 minutes for a picture (and by the way, travelling with someone you live and work with could potentially be stressful or try your patience, but samaria and i were like 2 peas in a pod and enjoyed every second of each others company.. amazing!), but we found our hostel, and could hardly throw our stuff down fast enough to get outside and explore.. so we spend the day walking around, touring the castle, enjoying the sun, talking to all the bagpipe players.. and just seeing as much as possible. met amazing ppl. found our way around. decided to eat.. found really really cheap chinese buffet, and chilled.. and then we walk out, happy with our 7 hours of walking around, and get out and its dark out, and all of a sudden are in the middle of 15,000 people with these huge torch looking candles.. we asked some cops what was going on and we had "just happened" to wander into the part of town that hosted the biggest commencement of new years festival in all of europe and were in the middle of a thousand year viking tradition. (are you serious?! -- praise God!!!) we couldnt believe it, hadnt a clue, and just were in the rite part of time, at just the exact rite time.. so we marched in the middle of these 15,000 ppl, 
there were bagpipes and drums and dancers and what seems like the whole of europe. we could not stop smiling.
so, here we are, no idea where all these ppl are going, but just goin' with it, well, we arrive about 2 miles later up this hill at the top of the city, with a colliseum, and basically, all the ppl with torches were going to set this dragon boat on fire.. so they lit it..
then we kept following everyone and we are on top of edinburgh and could see the entire of the city.. and all of a sudden these drummers start drumming, we start dancing and this band of bagpipe players come marching thru.. we just were dancing and snappin' fotos and in awe (amazing!!).. and then the bagpipe players ended and all of a sudden above this collesium were the most fantastic fireworks display i have ever seen. usually im not so impressed with firework.. but, whoa.. edinburgh's were for all of europe to see and i have never see anything like it.. these thousands and thousands of ppl were cheering and, oh my word, we could not believe that we were a part of this and could have easily missed it if we hadnt walked out of that chinese from that part of town, at that exact second, (glory to God).. whoa.. so everything eventually finished.. and we spent some time in the festival.. just in awe.
were walking back to the hostel only to hear this dude singing inside of the pub rite next to our hostel, so we just walked in, and "just happened" to walk into the most scottish pub in scotland with authentic old songs being sung by these men.. it was amazing.. im pretty sure we got proposed to like 12 times that nite.. haha...
then, we go to our hostel, so tired, but so happy.. and meet one of the ppl in our room. he was from korea, our age, and didnt speak english very well, but he started to tell us how he was here, he was a missionary, and was just travelling around, and it was just crazy to meet a korean Christian, in our room in edinburgh, it was amazing talking with him.. and we just kept praising God.
wake up the next morning, (at what turned out to be the perfect time for a free 3 hour walking tour that our hostel puts on.. wow!! (we were getting all these experiences for free, and just handed in our lap!) -- go God!) so, they let us keep our stuff there all day (amazing, cuz we had to check out, but they let us so we didnt have to carry our bags all day).. so then we go in this group of about 70 around the city, with a tour guide and went to all these amazing places we would have never found on our own, hearing the history and everything.
it was just amazing..
found another cheap buffet.. had more amazing hours.. made our way back to glasgow.. still gorgeous weather.. met amazing ppl along the way.. every single connection was perfectly timed, like bus to train, train to bus, bus to airport, we "just happened" to arrive at the moment they all were leaving.. we spent the nite in the airport..
it was hilarious. after about 1am, there were about 70 of us sleeping on the floor.. well, i slept for like an hour.. and then, (samaria and i bought alot of stuff, and we had already come with too much, so were like, well.. everything has been looked after so far, we just were like ok...) so off we go.. 4am, got up.. went thru security. not one problem.. haha.. just amazing.. only to arrive in dublin with the most beautiful sunrise i have seen in awhile.. so.. there ya go..
phew, i tried to make it short, but it was a brilliant weekedn. im pretty sure edinburgh's my new fave city. absolutely amazing.
i start work tmrw.. whoo hoo.. (= God bless
morning.. and get there only to realise i forgot my stuff i need to fly. i have nerve damage in my cheek that happened this last year after my nose surgery, that makes it excruciatingly painful for me to fly and the specialist doctor gave me all these perscriptions and stuff i need to take in order for it not to be horrific. well, i forgot them. so here i am at the airport.. in absolute fear. we start to pra
y. and keep praying about the whole weekend, cuz pretty much, our adventurous little souls had just booked tickets to some country over the busiest weekend possible and hadnt a clue.. so.. may i just say, God is so good.. as you read about the trip, you have to understand, that every second of our entire trip was directed and looked after by God. we did and saw things that we could not have planned better if we had tried and got to be a part of things that caused our mouths to be stuck open in awe the entire trip, without exaggeration, it was completly crazy to see the hand of God in everything we did. 
so, were are about to go thru security, only to realise how huge our bags were, and we werent going to check them, so again prayed, and we got thru with out an eyebrow being raised. (God is amazing) then, board the flight, get the exit row seats, meaning all the room in front of us in the world.. and 50 minutes later were in glasgow, a perfect, somehow completly pain free flight, not even the slightest problem. (glory to God), we arrive and are in this huge, beautiful city.. we found our hostel rite in the middle of town (amazing), left our stuff and away we went. snapped pics every 5 minutes, and looked around in amazement as policemen on horses were all over the place, and ppl sounding like mike myers on shrek were everywhere.. there were dudes in kilts everywhere..
and so we grabbed a map and off we went.. orientated ourselves to the city and walked around literally for about 12 hours.. ended up finding the biggest festival in glasgow, got in for free.. met amazing people (with the coolest accent i have ever heard).. and just had a pain free, rain free, gorgeous day exploring. our hostel was brilliant, we were in with 16 other ppl, and instead of being stuck in a room where everyone came in drunk and loud on a friday nite, we had all 14 other ppl in bed by 10pm on a friday nite! (which was amazing for us cuz we were takin off the next mrng early for edinburgh), was brilliant. (glory to God).THEN
we got up, had a free, huge breakfast, provided by the hostel, (amazing in itself).. then "just happened" to be rite on time for the bus to edinburgh. in we go. its pouring rain, the entire way to edinburgh.. which, was a beautiful drive.. the scottish highlands are like something out of braveheart (probably cuz it was filmed there, but it actually is like that), was so beautiful.. so, rain, rain and more rain.. and then we arrive in edinburgh, and the moment we step out of the bus, it stopped, and the clouds went and this gorgeous sun came out. we were like this is not going to last long, and yet.. the entire day. bright, gorgeous sun, with a beautiful sunset (again.. thanks God!!).. so, we get out.. have our huge bags, and all the suverneirs we had bought in glasgow and were standing in the middle of edinburgh city centre and didnt move. both of us were literally standing there, mouths open, cameras out, and poking each other, going, samaria look.. shawnda look..
were in the city, and up on the hill is a cliff, with a huge castle on it.. then as you keep looking, theres these medeval/gothic style buildings everywhere, and every building, monument, church, bank, and everything looked like a castle. everything was made of stone, that was stained black from all the chimney smoke, and there was a river dividing the city.. and literally, i cant even descibe it, but it was the most grandeur place i have ever been. we just stood there. not moving more than a 360 degree turn with our heads and cameras. it smelt amazing, cuz there was this huge festival going on. and all you see were castles and kilts, and all you can hear was bagpipes, from all the guys on the streets playing them.ok, so this is our first 10 minutes there, we knew it was going to be a good day.. again, having no clue where we were.. we asked someone for directions to our hostel, (and in their very cool accent), we get told its rite up on the hill (rite next to the castle!!!) (God's amazing)
so, up we traunt,
stopping every 3 minutes for a picture (and by the way, travelling with someone you live and work with could potentially be stressful or try your patience, but samaria and i were like 2 peas in a pod and enjoyed every second of each others company.. amazing!), but we found our hostel, and could hardly throw our stuff down fast enough to get outside and explore.. so we spend the day walking around, touring the castle, enjoying the sun, talking to all the bagpipe players.. and just seeing as much as possible. met amazing ppl. found our way around. decided to eat.. found really really cheap chinese buffet, and chilled.. and then we walk out, happy with our 7 hours of walking around, and get out and its dark out, and all of a sudden are in the middle of 15,000 people with these huge torch looking candles.. we asked some cops what was going on and we had "just happened" to wander into the part of town that hosted the biggest commencement of new years festival in all of europe and were in the middle of a thousand year viking tradition. (are you serious?! -- praise God!!!) we couldnt believe it, hadnt a clue, and just were in the rite part of time, at just the exact rite time.. so we marched in the middle of these 15,000 ppl, 
there were bagpipes and drums and dancers and what seems like the whole of europe. we could not stop smiling.so, here we are, no idea where all these ppl are going, but just goin' with it, well, we arrive about 2 miles later up this hill at the top of the city, with a colliseum, and basically, all the ppl with torches were going to set this dragon boat on fire.. so they lit it..
then we kept following everyone and we are on top of edinburgh and could see the entire of the city.. and all of a sudden these drummers start drumming, we start dancing and this band of bagpipe players come marching thru.. we just were dancing and snappin' fotos and in awe (amazing!!).. and then the bagpipe players ended and all of a sudden above this collesium were the most fantastic fireworks display i have ever seen. usually im not so impressed with firework.. but, whoa.. edinburgh's were for all of europe to see and i have never see anything like it.. these thousands and thousands of ppl were cheering and, oh my word, we could not believe that we were a part of this and could have easily missed it if we hadnt walked out of that chinese from that part of town, at that exact second, (glory to God).. whoa.. so everything eventually finished.. and we spent some time in the festival.. just in awe.were walking back to the hostel only to hear this dude singing inside of the pub rite next to our hostel, so we just walked in, and "just happened" to walk into the most scottish pub in scotland with authentic old songs being sung by these men.. it was amazing.. im pretty sure we got proposed to like 12 times that nite.. haha...
then, we go to our hostel, so tired, but so happy.. and meet one of the ppl in our room. he was from korea, our age, and didnt speak english very well, but he started to tell us how he was here, he was a missionary, and was just travelling around, and it was just crazy to meet a korean Christian, in our room in edinburgh, it was amazing talking with him.. and we just kept praising God.
wake up the next morning, (at what turned out to be the perfect time for a free 3 hour walking tour that our hostel puts on.. wow!! (we were getting all these experiences for free, and just handed in our lap!) -- go God!) so, they let us keep our stuff there all day (amazing, cuz we had to check out, but they let us so we didnt have to carry our bags all day).. so then we go in this group of about 70 around the city, with a tour guide and went to all these amazing places we would have never found on our own, hearing the history and everything.
it was just amazing..found another cheap buffet.. had more amazing hours.. made our way back to glasgow.. still gorgeous weather.. met amazing ppl along the way.. every single connection was perfectly timed, like bus to train, train to bus, bus to airport, we "just happened" to arrive at the moment they all were leaving.. we spent the nite in the airport..
it was hilarious. after about 1am, there were about 70 of us sleeping on the floor.. well, i slept for like an hour.. and then, (samaria and i bought alot of stuff, and we had already come with too much, so were like, well.. everything has been looked after so far, we just were like ok...) so off we go.. 4am, got up.. went thru security. not one problem.. haha.. just amazing.. only to arrive in dublin with the most beautiful sunrise i have seen in awhile.. so.. there ya go..
phew, i tried to make it short, but it was a brilliant weekedn. im pretty sure edinburgh's my new fave city. absolutely amazing.
i start work tmrw.. whoo hoo.. (= God bless
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